Sunday, July 20, 2008

Plastic knives aren't a public nuisance

The past week was full of activity. In some relatively insignificant news, the ruling government’s continuing love-hate relationship with The Right’s opposite (which, some consider ironically, isn’t Wrong) took another handful of twists, a lady (who, again, some consider ironically, is half an illusion) took another step towards her cherished dream of leading this very country, another few hundred children were born, another brawl decorated our (some consider ironically) national game and the relationship with our neighbours, and a few more hundred children were born. But the one big news development over the last weekend (which, nobody considers ironically, dominated prime-time on most of our news channels) was the launch of (proclaimed to be India’s most legen-wait-for-it-darrry) chat show hosted by (again, nobody at all considers ironically) India’s most loved (at least if it is assumed that TV channels show what the people want) celebrity, who I shall refrain from naming because of possible notices being issued. The show’s first guest promised that whenever he needed an item number in his movies, the first person he’d call would be the host and played, as he does with any role, the good guest to perfection.

In some more small (compared to the big news, a drop in a glass of sea buckthorn juice) news, a family was out shopping in a city (wrongly conceived to be, on many an occasion, in Orissa, Kerala, Tamil Nadu and in one extreme case, Gujarat) southwards on the eastern edge of the country. After a not-so-difficult purchase of a pair of jeans, and another piece of footwear, one of them left the others at a pastry shop and left, mysteriously, to don’t-know-where. After 20 chocolate-gulping minutes at the shop, which included a few embarrassingly dangerous ones with the kid saying ‘Hi!’ to an unknown lady and smiling at her after he thought she whispered his name, with her (apparently) fat (quite apparent) boyfriend staring right down at him and his mom right beside him, they left for home. At around midnight, when the kid was busy with yet another Sudoku puzzle and his mom was trying to get a few forty winks (after some mentally draining attempts at the day’s newspaper’s Sudoku puzzles), his brother mysteriously vanished (again), apparently to take a phone call. He returned with a (now customary) warm hug, a ‘Happy birthday’ wish followed, and, a (now customary) kiss from mom, a (now customary) ‘Appi Baa-day to you’ and a few (always ready) tears from his aunt, and a (quite big) bite of his favourite chocolate cake later, the kid received one of the surprises of his life- his first guitar! The kid, happy enough to jump for dwarf planet Ceres, eagerly tore the zip down to show off the skills he had (visibly, quite badly) learnt back at his hostel. After quite a few totally out-of-sync notes, and a spattering of his (visibly, quite poor) knowledge of the instrument, he gently placed it back for a (one more?!) bite of the cake and started taking calls and replying to messages. He couldn’t sleep that night, in excitement, in total surprise and, most importantly, in simple love for his family. Even the fact that a few girls may miss ‘scrapping’ or messaging him their wishes (or rather give it a miss), or even a few close (guy) friends might do the same (which, in another show of endearing love, they didn’t!) or a million other not-so-positive thoughts couldn’t stop him from sporting one big (for once, not fake or Rishi Kapoor-ish in any way) smile in the darkness of the bedroom. Apparently, the kid was now officially an adult, which he seemed to like in some ways for the sake of a few acts like voting and driving, but just age can never determine that justly. So, the kid’s heart felt content as he went to sleep, one more day, as a kid.


P.S. - The kid wants to thank every single wonderful person who wished him on his birthday, and also those who forgot and those who chose not to.


P.P.S. – Sea buckthorn juice isn’t great, try Black currant; looks like red wine and tastes like heaven!


P.P.P.S. – The kid chooses not to drive in public interest and not (to quote his History & Civics textbook) to exercise his franchise, in private.

P.P.P.P.S. - Pizza Hut burnt quite a hole in the pocket and The Dark Knight is a nice movie.

14 comments:

Amit... said...

Hey !! I didn't knew you just turned 18. I never knew when was 'D-day'. So happy Birthday now..!!

I hope you can edit your post for a P.P.P.P.P.S that just let the poor guys like me know when actually you turned an adult.

Murty said...

Thanks! And I really appreciate the hard work put in to count the P's...

Vikesh said...

Good Post as always Mr. Murty.
To prove that I understood this post of yours, I would claim that it was Rakhi Sawanth you were talking about!

(There is a finite possibility that I may not understand your posts even after several deeply-involving-googling reading sessions!)...Situation at my side seem to be improving as I familiarize with your (elegant and ironically, complicated) writing style!

Anyways, Happy Birthday once again, though I happen to have wished you already!....As far as GPL is concerned, you don't need to worry about that!

Keep it Up!

Anonymous said...

All hail the item girls! All hail the loving (quoting her Highness herself) media-waale! All hail serial kissers!

Whilsy you're busy piling up the hail, just a quiet Happy Birthday to Nelson Mandela, too... (who made the front page of only a select few newspapers, sadly)

Anonymous said...

...and hence an adult-toon was born
and those 'plastic knives' were preserved after they became 'private'pleasures.......

happy birthday 'incomprehensible' uncle

And why does the kid choose not to exercise his franchise, in private..

Murty said...

Well, the knife might as well go down with the cake box...Thanks for most part of the wish!

As for the vote, well, Dad just informed me last night that I can't vote in the general elections or the state elections this year (as I'm not born on or before Jan 1, 2008)...So an explanatioon is unnecessary...

Saagar said...

Congratulations on your first guitar. I'm planning to get a drum set next sem. Let's start a band.
And newly-turned-18, cut down on the parentheses.

Anonymous said...

Erm....ehem-ehem. Eighteen, eh? Enjoy it while you can. Oh, and you just got a black star for saying that the Dark Knight was a 'nice' movie. Hope Tejo won't kill you.

P.S. Happy Birthday. Dela thinks that it helps. I don't.
P.P.S. Thanks for the Open ID option.

Sushant said...

i can thiunk of atleast a hundred expletives for you when ypou call dark knight a "nice" movie!!! man, i watched the first day first show and again went for it on the same sunday....so watch out before you degrade the movie even a bit!!
p.s. of course themovie's characters didnt match upto you...none of then was half as "the first H in your HHH"!
hows that for a lowblow!!

Murty said...

@Lefty
Nice idea, but if you take me in, you'll probably do well to win 'The suckiest band alive...' show (most probably on VH1)...As for the brackets, I'm working on it but I've almost always got something extra (read: useless info) to add...

@Raps
Why, why, why? When will I...forget it...

@Sushi
Anger and typing don't go together...so do desperation (read: the first H in HHH) and typing, I assure you...And, darn, I was almost about to argue why it shouldn't exactly be IMDB #1 already...Oops, I'm under a cross-hair now!

The One said...

Well the comments on your post are as interesting as your post.

And the kid could have dreamed the hostess taking his interview on his b'day ....

Murty said...

I'd rather call that a nightmare, Chussa; without going into the details too much...

Anonymous said...

Apologies, minion. A train journey and a subsequent headache kept me from commenting earlier. Do put up that pic of yours with that toothbrush-like thing ('Excalibur', if you like). And I had a laugh when I learned that Rakhi Sawant's new show was titled, 'Rakhi Showz'.

Murty said...

So did I...'The (Great 'Indian') Rakhi Sawant Showz'...Brillia-o-nt...As for the pic request, the posts are bad enough...